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Ten Guidelines For Strong Sentences
Make Dialogue Tags Pull Their Weight
Program review: Revising Your Manuscript
Atten-huh! Basic Military Training
Set it Here - Set it There - How to Set it Anywhere
A Short Course on Sexual Tension
It's Not What You Do, But How You Do It
Some years back when I first joined a writer's critique group, I decided I was a turtle. The other women in the set were younger, college graduated, savvy people who knew reams more about the sophisticated world than I did. A product of my own generation, I'd never experienced the sex revolution first hand, any recreational drugs other than wine, smart politics, power suits, or being my own woman, capable and talented and recognized for it. Most of them lived with those contemporary ideas as reality, or at least in their peers.
Being a turtle wasn't a new discovery--I've always accomplished things at a slower pace than others. I'm convinced my brain simply does not process information the same, frequently seeing things differently than the norm, and I'm often the last one to get a joke.
But I always wanted to write fiction, and through my great career as super-duper wife and mother and other various jobs--one of which was at a weekly newspaper where I gained my first by-line--that desire never faded. When the right time came for me to pursue that dream at age 49, I asked myself--was I too late? Too old? Would anyone want to read sweet, old fashioned love stories? Was there a market for me?
I soon found my writer friends were far advanced beyond me. One could write thirty pages a day. Thirty pages? Even forty? Yikes! I'd be lucky to make ten.
Another had perfect sentences and excellent paragraphs, first try!
Groan---Plotting, and the never ending why, one strong pal hammered at me. My plotting wasn't bad, but she was better.
An eleven page love scene? Eleven! Those eleven pages made it home to most of the critique husbands to read and tickles our memories to this day--but they weren't mine and I knew I'd be lucky to evoke even a tenth of that kind of blush or hormone rage.
I once told an author friend she made me want to put my head down and bawl--I could never write with the beauty she did. I hope she wins a RITA this year--she deserves one.
Did I experience writer envy? You bet! I admit it freely. No personal jealousy of their achievements or recognition, you understand, but envy because I always seemed so slow. Slow to get into it, slow to find success.
So...should I give up my dream of writing because I'm not a swift gazelle or a beautiful cheetah, I asked? A turtle is not what most people would bet on.
But God created me a turtle. A turtle plods--that's me. In the old tale involving a turtle and a hare in a race, the turtle wins by keeping on keeping on. That's me, too.
Furthermore, I believed wholeheartedly, and still do, that love is the first emotional requirement of life. I want to tell all the world that giving and receiving real love is the equivalent to achieving greatness. We women want to, need to believe that. That's why we write love stories.
Women want to, need to be recognized and respected for who they are, as well. Most times, however, success and talent are judged on an unequal basis, as in matching a turtle with a hare, or a hare against a cheetah. The mistake we make is measuring ourselves by yardsticks other than our own. Clearly, we need to set our own individual goals to truly gauge our progress in everything we do. In writing, especially.
When I finally sold a novel, I called all my friends and told them, "This turtle is crossing the finish line." The very month my first book was out, I turned 59. My gazelle and cheetah friends rejoiced with me then and continue to cheer me on now.
Several years and four books in print later I continue to plod, and sometimes I find being a slowpoke still discouraging. However, I've made a recent discovery about turtles-- one I find that lifts my head toward my next goal--besides man, turtles are the longest living animal on earth.
Update: My sixth novel will appear next June and I am currently writing my seventh, under contract. While I still write at a snail's pace, I have a multitude of Characters and story ideas racing through my mind.
All kinds--inspirational, historical, and cozy mystery. I plan on living long enough to write at least a tenth of them. If you want to join my cheering squad, please visit my web page and sign up. And set your own Yardsticks.
by Jan Kenny
The French called them perruques; the English dubbed them periwigs. By either name, the Church forbade men to don wigs, suggesting they wear their hair short, straight and unadorned. Even Henry IV went so far as to ban wigs and long hair at court.
Before wigs became the rage, fashionable men wore their hair long, painstakingly arranged with waves and curls. For those with a good head of hair, it was a chore to keep their hair clean and maintain these elaborate coifs. Bald pates, and those with thin hair, found it nearly impossible to attain the styles.
The periwig solved those problems, and with the Reformation of 1517, the Church relaxed its stance against wigs. By 1580, wigs were much more than hair fashions for men - they were an article of dress in their own right. When the craze peaked in the seventeenth century, the court of Versailles boasted forty full-time wigmakers in residence.
Because of thinning hair and a severely receding hairline, Elizabeth I kept on hand a vast amount of intricately curled red-orange wigs. Mary, Queen of Scots, wore an auburn one, a fact that only became known after she was beheaded.
It's been rumored that after he went bald, Louis XIII of France wore wigs to maintain his prestige and dignity as king of a nation renowned as being the leader of fashion. In England, the Duke of York, and his brother, Charles II, decided to start wearing periwigs in 1663.
With false hair the answer to equality among the classes, men swarmed to the periwig maker. After having their long hair cropped, men paid £2 or £3 for a wig.
Those first periwigs were made of human hair, and some men had wigs fashioned from their own shorn tresses. Styles of the 1660's followed the natural line and look of hair and colors ranged from blond to black.
Having a wig meant you didn't have to wash your hair, a practice that wasn't done with great frequency. However, many grew lax about keeping their wig properly maintained, too.
Another drawback was that periwig care was costly, needing constant professional attention to keep it looking well. Many gentlemen found it was easier to purchase new wigs and sell their old ones to secondhand shops, where a good deal of the poorer classes could afford to acquire a wig.
Huge and extravagant became the vogue. Prices for periwigs soared to fifty guineas. As the demand for wigs increased, the hair from horses and goats were used. Some cheap wigs were made from wool. Prices varied wildly. So did names of styles: the bob, the ramillie, the pig-tail, the cadogan, the campaigne and the bag-wig.
Shorter, tied-back wigs were introduced in the eighteenth century for travel and sport but were quickly adopted by the ordinary working man. False hair had all but completely replaced hats as decorative items of men's attire.
In 1720, flour or starch was used to color wigs gray or white. A huge amount was needed, making the process extremely messy. Special areas, called powder rooms, were introduced to keep the fallout confined.
Powdered wigs remained the vogue until 1798, when William Pitt, Prime Minister, introduced a tax on powder. Pitt's enraged opponents, led by the Duke of Beaufort, refused to wear powdered wigs thereafter, and the trend died with only the elderly and old fashioned choosing to don powdered wigs.
Natural hair, both in color and style, found favor with the majority of men. Only the Court and army used powder on their wigs. In the twentieth century the powdered wig remains part of the official attire of English barristers.
Ten Guidelines For Strong Sentences
by Linda Madl
Use everyday words. Bigger is not better.
Write short sentences. Best for strength and clarity.
Favor the active voice. Frequent use of the verbs of being (is, was, were) may be a symptom of weak sentences. 'He walks every day.' Is stronger than, 'He is walking daily.'
Don't turn verbs into nouns.
Avoid qualifiers. When you use an accurate verb, you don't need an adverb. Beware of words ending in -ly. Also beware of prepositional phrases. More than three of these qualifiers per sentence is a warning you're headed for a weak, confusing sentence.
Avoid use of the word 'not.' Whenever possible use other negative forms: only, just, unaware, unlikely, few, unable, little, impossible, unsafe.
Omit needless words. Watch for useless phrases such as 'kind of', 'sort of', or verb phrases such as, 'He began to open the door', when 'He opened the door' will do.
Keep related words together. Avoid splitting verb phrases and prepositional phrases.
Avoid redundancies. Watch for phrases such as 'totally engulfed', 'full stop', and 'Four-legged horse.'
Be conversational. You should be able to read your work out loud comfortably.
Make Dialogue Tags Pull Their Weight
by M. Sue Friedly
For the sake of accuracy, this should probably be considered an opinion piece, since it's based more on what I like as a reader than what I know as a writer. My viewpoint is predictably skewed. Being an anal-retentive ex-teacher, counselor and public speaker doesn't help much either.
As writers we've all been exposed to the advice to keep dialogue tags simple and uncomplicated, the old "he said" and "she said." Used sparingly, these seem to work well enough. Supposedly, the reader's eye skims over this without registering the pause or interruption.
However, using the same tags consistently, and the same placement in relation to each sentence of dialogue would quickly bore most readers. Having been born with one foot firmly wedged in my mouth, I feel compelled to disagree with the above "skimming eye" theory. An unrelenting reprise of the "he said/she said" effects me much like calamary - a little goes a long way.
This article began nagging at me soon after reading part of a book in which the author followed the above advice with minimal variation. A few tags changed to "she asked" and "he replied," certainly nice enough. A few more were modified by -ly adverbs (refer back to calamary). After reading nine or ten of these in close proximity, I knew I'd read my last page. My reader/writer's eye refused to "skim without registering." The repetitious and often unnecessary tags became a distraction that slowed the story and lost me in the sagging middle. (Or was the with a sagging middle?) Anyway-
According to Jesse Lee Kercheval, Building Fiction: How to Develop Plot and Structure, 1997, every conversation, every line of dialogue should be "both interesting and either add to your reader's understanding of your character, or help establish a sense of place, or advance the plot." Descriptive dialogue tags can enhance or expand on all of these.
Monica Wood, author of Description, from the Writer's Digest series The Elements of Fiction Writing, 1995, states "Descriptive interruptions almost always enhance a dialogue sequence, because conversations do not take place in a vacuum." Descriptive interruptions may come in the form of full narrative breaks, but more frequently take the "briefer form of dialogue tags and gestural pauses."
Simple Dialogue Tags: "he said/she said" remain valid tags to identify characters or suggest a pause, and should remain part of your arsenal of varied approaches to framing or expanding the meaning or impact of a character's dialogue. There are times when no tag is necessary, such as repartee between two characters for several lines - just so your reader doesn't have to backtrack to figure out who said what.
Descriptive Dialogue Tags: describe your character's actions and/or state of mind. Example: "You've decided," she whispered, blinking back against the sting of unshed tears.
Gestural Pauses: enhance or replace tags with full-sentence interruptions. These usually indicate character mood or motive. Example: "Lousy?" He narrowed his eyes to keep them from dropping out of his head. "No, I feel dandy. Just dandy. I live for hangovers." From Nora Roberts, The Calhoun Women, 1996. Nora is a past master at making these techniques work.
You can vary placement of your D.D.T.s at the beginning, end, or by interrupting in the middle of dialogue. Variety of tags is the first key: some lines with simple tags of two or three words, some left to stand alone, some modified with a phrase or a full-sentence break.
The second key is to make them work - not just take up space. D.D.T.s and G.P.s can advance the plot, deepen characterization by exposing mood, motives, reactions and state of mind. These working tags can help control pacing and tension, help to build three-dimensional characters, and keep your story-line simmering along.
Rafe ground his teeth. "And?"
AND remember: "Variety is the spice of life," and variety can definitely add spice to your story.
His eyes slid shut. "There's that, too."
Program review: Linda Madl on Revising Your Manuscript
Thanks to Linda for a marvelous program about how to revise! Here's a thumbnail recap:
Linda said that when you've finished your 1st draft, you can relax and celebrate for 5 minutes. "Work really begins after the 1st draft." Your ego is the first thing that must go. Excise yourself from your manuscript. Get rid of "pet" foreign phrases, poetic descriptions, philosophical asides, etc.
Besides grammar and punctuation basics, your most important tools will be the delete key and your computer's search-and-replace function.
As to style, sentence meanings must be clear. Make the best possible word choice - have you used too many adjectives; used the most specific words? If a sentence is over 30 words, you're headed for trouble. Find a way to break it up. Watch paragraph breaks - try to keep them to 8-10 lines, and at least 2 per page. Ask yourself, does your writing sound like you, or the last author you read?
Anyone, Linda says, can write a flashy opening, but can you carry it through to the end? Make your opening interesting; seduce the reader, and make sure she'll have a good idea of the people, place, and what's happening.
You must give characters enough detail to make them complete - vocations, mannerisms, attitudes, etc., all help to individualize them, and set up conflict and interaction later on. Reveal their individuality through dialogue; everyone shouldn't sound the same. Make characters' names work for you - remember "Nurse Ratchet" and "Darth Vader"! Most important, keep your characters consistent in all they do, say, and in their motivation.
Keep dialogue tight and moving along. Don't overload dialogue with expository details, and keep it sounding natural, not contrived. Sharpen and intensify speech where you can; cut unnecessary attributions; use basic "he said, she said" tags. Make sure dialogue serves a purpose, that your people don't speak just for the sake of having something to say.
Be sure to completely play out confrontational scenes. Don't cheat the reader. Something must HAPPEN in every chapter, in ever scene. Have you dramatized important events and facts, or summarized them? Make each scene dramatic, and work for you. You want your reader satisfies at the end of each chapter. Each event gets bigger, more dramatic and important and builds to the end.
Make sure POV shifts are clear, and keep in mind that editors HATE author intrusion! POV must be instantly clear to the reader. Make sure POV length is long enough to keep the reader's interest and to maintain scene integrity. Be selective about secondary POV shifts - don't confuse the reader.
Make sure chronology (times of day, etc.) is correct and consistent; be especially wary when dealing with flashbacks to make time shifts clear.
Keep your tone clear and consistent - if the story starts out with humor, end it with humor. And, no matter the general tone, use humor at appropriate times.
Proofread carefully!
Remember, revising is an art, and a necessary part of the craft of writing.
Atten-huh! Basic Military Training
Though the military forces comprise a small number of the population, chances are you'll run into a service man or woman in your lifetime, maybe even include one in your manuscript. Although my knowledge is limited to the Marine Corps, some of the terms do carry over to all service branches. Here are a few basic terms you might care to use:
Although civilians may wear a hat, military personnel wear a cover. One's cover is removed when inside, but is worn while on guard duty, both inside and outside, along with the utility belt and weapon.
The following nicknames for members of the different branches of service are also used, though seldom appreciated when it refers to your branch: Marines are jarheads; the Navy, squids; Air Force, fly boys; Army, dogs; and the Reservists of each branch are called weekend warriors. There are other nicknames, but they're not always appropriate to print.
A commonly used rank for TV and books, from enlisted personnel rank structure, is sergeant. There are many different levels of sergeant to choose from; make sure that the one you choose suits the age and the length of the character's career time. If your character has been in the service for eight years or more and has a good record, chances are he/she will be a staff sergeant, and have a rocker (half-circle-shaped) on his/her chevron (the cloth insignia worn on the sleeve of the uniform). Two rockers indicates a Gunnery (gunny) Sgt. [GySgt]; three, a Master Sgt. [MSgt]; four, a Master Gunnery Sgt. [MGySgt]. A Marine or Army sergeant is equal in rank to a Petty Officer, Second Class in the Navy, or Staff Sergeant in the Air Force.
If your character is an infantryman, he will be referred to as a grunt. (And if you'd ever carried the 782 Gear on a forced march, you'd understand why! The gear consists of a full pack, bedroll, 2-3 days of clothes and food, rifle, and more, a utility belt with canteen and ammo, etc., and weights a ton! Well, not literally, but it sure feels like it by the end of the day.) The food carried in the packs is called MREs (Meals Ready to Eat, don't require cooking, and while not like Mom used to make, believe it or not, they're not half-bad.)
If you make your character an officer, but give him at least four prior years in the enlisted ranks, she'll be a mustanger.
If your Navy seaman encounters someone wearing a baseball cap with scrambled eggs (gold braid laid on the bill in intricate designs) on it, he'd better salute - it's an officer. The more scrambled the eggs - the more intricate the design and what's in the design - the higher the rank.
Learn about the uniforms of the service branch your character is, or was, in. A uniform requirement may depend on the job, time of year, (dress blues, dress whites, khakis, camouflage greens, or browns - called chocolate chips) etc., and have a classification such as: Uniform Alpha, Bravo, and Charlie. Does the uniform have hashmarks (indicating years of service)? In the Marines, each hashmark indicates four years of service. But marks on the sleeve are not all created equal, nor do they all mean the same thing. The crows on a Navy uniform indicate rank. A crow looks like a wide, inverted V, and is sometimes called a bird. One crow is a Petty Officer, 3rd class (equal to an Army of Marine corporal, or an Air Force Sr. Airman). Two crows is PO 2nd class, three, a PO 1st class. A senior Petty Officer has one star above his crow, and so on.
Unlike Patton, servicemen and women wear their medals only on their dress uniforms and only for the most important occasions, such as a change of command ceremony, or a medal awarding ceremony. They are awarded an equivalent bar ribbon along with their medal, and wear these on their dress uniforms, over the left breast pocket, instead. The colors of the ribbons, width of the stripes, and number of stripes on each bar has special meaning. The bar/medal may have been awarded for valor (Bronze Star), Good Conduct Medal, the Navy Cross (heroism) to commemorate service during combat, or other involvement, like Desert Shield/Storm) or for injury during combat (Purple Heart), etc.
As a writer, it is not required that you have your own military background, or a family member who has seen service, but it is appropriate to know a little in order to give your story authenticity. There are more of us former and active military personnel out in the world than you may think, and reading your books. Don't lose us as readers by having inaccurate data on your service man or woman.
Set it Here - Set it There - How to Set it Anywhere
by Linda Madl
I read an article once on how to create a whole new world for a science fiction story. The author explained how critical it is for the writer to establish an entire believable world for the sci-fi reader.
The author was correct - as far as he went. As a historical romance writer, I knew that the future isn't the only place that must be created for readers. Creating a believable stage is vital to any fiction: sci-fi, western, romance, historical, mystery, suspense, or fantasy.
A story's setting is what puts readers in the moment with the character. It gives the reader the first sense of who a character is and what that character is experiencing.
More importantly, a setting, well portrayed, lends the story a sense of truth and credibility. If a tale is set in the south of Spain, the reader needs to feel hot, sweaty, and thirsty --just like the characters. He needs to see the sun baking the town square and the steam rising from the back of the little burrow tethered at the side of the church. He must smell the aroma of the favorite native food as it sizzles over the fire.
All the above are realistic details of a particular fictional reality to which a reader can relate. Presented well, that fictional reality steals away a reader's troublesome disbelief. Once the reader steps into the setting you have created, he or she becomes part of your story. The writer's victory.
How do we as writers entice the reader onto our stage and into our story?
The key is detail, selective detail.
Readers come to a story with plenty of scene-building equipment and they become restless if prevented from using it. Long paragraphs of items in an apartment - furniture, food in the cupboard or clothes in the closet - bore the reader. No reader cares what is hanging in the closet unless it is a skeleton or a smoking gun.
Trust your reader. Given the right, selective details he or she will paint your set and eagerly move through your story with you.
Basically there are three types of details to use.
1. Exotic/stereotype - especially useful for transitions and for giving a sense of the time and place.Use of pertinent, sensory detail is extremely evocative. The smell of a city street. Textures - rough wood, cold stone, smooth silk. The tartness of gooseberry pie or the sigh of colorful hot-air balloons against a blue sky. All these details are sensual images that instantly paint setting in the reader's head.These are the landmark sort of details instantly recognizable to your reader. Fashionable bell-bottom jeans. Notre Dame. The Statue of Liberty under construction. Snow-covered Central Park. The Tulleries in springtime. The French Quarter deserted in the dawn. Or one might use a well-known personality of the time, like Charles Dickens or a social function: a tea is clearly British, but a square dance suggests the American West.
2. Character details or personal preferences - a character who likes to smoke a long clay pipe will be an entirely different man from a cowboy who rolls his own cigarettes. Or a girl who loves heavy metal rock will be unlike her classmate who likes new age music. These details give a sense of individual temperaments, tastes or social background as well as time.
3. Sensual details or subjective sensory details appeal to the five senses: Touch. Sound. Taste. Sight. Smell.
Compiled by Lisa Snider
Black: Onyx, Ebony, Lampblack, Midnight, Blue-black, Carbon, Coal, Raven, Jet, Shadow, Ink, Black Pear, Anthracite, Sable, Obsidian, Pitch, Pepper, Soot, Opaque, Licorice.
Purple:
Amethyst, Lilac, Magenta, Violet, Blackberry, Mauve, Indigo, Orchid, Heliotrope, Dewberry, Plum, Grape, Lavender, Egg Plant, Heather.
Green:
Jade, Grass, Forest Bluish-green, Emerald, Aqua, Moss, Seafoam, Pine, Mallard, Sea, Malachite, Mist, Verdant, Pea, Hunter, Leaf, Pistachio, Kiwi, Spearmint, Aquamarine, Lime, Olive, Caledonia, Chartreuse, Kelly, Sage, Apple, Spruce, Mint, Celery, Periodot, Dill Parsley, Holly, Fern, Baltic, Frog Kelp, Avocado, Lettuce, Eucalyptus, Fatigue, Bayberry, Loden, Gooseberry, Bottle, Fir, Basil, Willow.
Blue:
Azure, Electric, Wedgewood, Neon, Turquoise, Periwinkle, Cornflower, Powder, Sky, Peacock, Slate, Zinc, Rosemary, French, Air Force, Ultra Marine, Indigo, Sapphire, Steel, Ice, Lapis Lazuli, Marine, Delft, Arctic, Mallard, Bluebird, Carpi, Union, Wisteria, China, Teal, Royal, Cobalt, Robin's Egg, Baby, Navy, Glacier, Federal, Moroccan, Denim, Ensign, Blueberry, Chambray, Bluebell, Mediterranean.
White/Off-White:
Milk, Quartz, Cream, Ecru, Magnolia, Opal, Linen, Winter, Angora, Frosty, Almond, Cauliflower, Birch, Swan, Cotton Seed, Pearly, Eggshell, Ivory, Alabaster, Oyster, Parchment, Stone, Moonstone, Champaign, Cameo, Sugar, String, Diamond, Snowdrops, Natural, Rice, Vanilla, Jade, Oatmeal, Lily, Salt, Chalk, Snow, Bone, Antique, Muslin, Cement, Gardenia, Taffy, Plaster.
Gray/Silver:
Smoke, Silvery, Tattletale, Charcoal, Pewter, Sooty, Salt and Pepper, Dun, Pearl, Slate, Cloud, Cannon, Armor, Chinchilla, Aluminum, Mortar, Tin, Gunmetal, Hoary, Steel, Funeral, Battle ship, Diesel, Nickel, Lead, Quicksilver, Ashen, Dove, Concrete, Iron, Graphite, Artichoke, Platinum, Tinsel, Mercury, Primer.
Yellow/Gold:
Fool's Gold, Burnished, Flaxen, Butter, Blond, Brass, Sandy, Mustard, Topaz, Buttercup, Forsythia, Honeydew, Coreopsis, Cat's Eye, Cheese, Tawny, Palomino, Jonquil, Platinum, Honey, White-gold, Wheat, Chamois, Pear, Butterscotch, Corn, Citrine, Maize, Goldenrod, Buff, Ash Blond, Straw, Cadmium, Daffodil, Primrose, Curry, Banana, Pineapple, Sunflower, Canary, Cornsilk, Marigold, Beeswax.
Red/Pink:
Ruby, Dusky Rose, Claret, Maroon, Ox-blood, Brick, Tyrian Cochineal, Blood, Lobster, Scarlet, Salmon, Candy Apple, Garnet, Crimson, Shrimp, Apple, Brass, Rubicund, Auburn, Cherry, Ashes of Roses, Vermilion, Strawberry, Currant, Coral, Rose, Wine, Burgundy, Tomato, Beet, Fire Engine, Red Amber, Rubellite, Youngberry, Mango, Magenta, Tabasco, Hot Pink, Fuchsia, Watermelon, Holy Berry, Barberry, Boysenberry, Geranium, Cardinal, Vermeil, Loganberry, Cayenne Pepper, Corn Poppy, Coralberry, Wineberry, Pepto-Bismol Pink, Bismuth, Cerise Carmine, Cinnabar, Bordeaux, Cranberry, Brandy, Canyon, Elderberry Shell Pink, Heather, Poinsettia, Coralbells, Tearose, Paprika.
Brown:
Earth, Cocoa, Copper, Cinnamon, Tortoise Shell, Mahogany, Taupe, Tan, Henna, Fawn, Ginger, Rust, Khaki, Mushroom, Saddle, Brunette, Buckskin, Foxy, Chocolate, Bay, Sand, Toffee, Roan, Butternut, Coffee, Tawney, Rosewwod, Café au lait, Hazel, Ecru, Umber, Bronze, Nutmeg, Raisin, Maple, Tanned, Mocha, Walnut, Chili, Espresso, Cashmere, Clay, Potato, Tobacco, Bark, Amaretto, Suntan, Cordovan, Twine, Bamboo, Hazelnut, Driftwood, Peanut, Chestnut, Pecan, Camel, Spice, Mohair, Wicker, Timber, Pebble, Foxtail, Putty, Jute, Oak, Cashew, Butterrum, Mousy, Hickory, Drab, Acorn, Caramel, Cedar, Champagne, Suede, Butterscotch, Tea, Sandstone, Fudge, Redwood, Cognac, Burlap, Cappuccino, Desert, Latten, Soy.
Orange:
Pumpkin, Burnt Orange, Terra-cotta, Raspberry, Russet, Melon, Berry, Carrot, Tangerine, Nasturtium, Peach, Trumpet Vine, Canyon, Coral, Apricot, Rust, Bittersweet, Cantaloupe, Titan, Persimmon, Marigold.
by Lisa Snider (excerpts from the Indian Doctor by Nancy Locke Doane)
Quinsy -- Wet a flannel cloth in boiling vinegar and apply around the neck. Repeat as often as the cloth becomes dry. Make one pint of brewers yeast and take one tablespoonful every few minutes - gargling and swallowing some. Continue the same process until gone.
Whooping Cough -- Make equal parts of elecampane, skunks cabbage, hoarhound, and spignut. Boil and strain. Boil again to the consistence of tar. Add twice it's weight in honey to the tar mixture and warm in oven until baked. Take one half teaspoon often throughout the day.
Sore -- Take one pound male hogs lard, one half pound spignut, one fourth pound Solomon's seal, one ounce extract of dandelion, one ounce of lobelia seed, one ounce of spirits turpentine, four ounces rosin, two ounces beeswax. Make into salve and apply to infected area.
Fever -- First induce vomiting with lobelia, accompanied by an alcoholic drink. This encourages perspiration. Then relieve bowels with one tablespoonful of the small milkweed, bitterroot, in water. Repeat if necessary until urine and feces is normal. If fever persists, repeat steps above again and prepare bitters with yellow polpar, balmony, and black cherry bark in wine or gin.
Swelling and inflammation -- Mix one pint of wine, white bread crumbs, and a spoonful of oil of sage. Make into a mush. Apply hot to inflamed areas two or three times daily.
Pains and swellings -- Take Provinse roses, port wine, wheat bran and oil of roses, and make a poultice. Apply warm to ailing places.
For cracked hands -- Wash hands in warm water and then with soap. Rub hands with soap thoroghly. Scour hands for two minutes with ashes. Wash hands again in warm water. Repeat above process several times cures dryness and keeps hands soft.
Deafness caused by illness -- Cabbage juice dropped into the ear.
Ointment for sores -- One half pound Venice turpentine, laurel oil, one drachm, sage juice, two drachms, gum elemi, half a drachm. Combine to make an ointment.
Headache -- Water from a walnut tree. One ounce drank at intervals alleviates a headache, however bad.
Nose bleed -- One drop of vinegar in the ear and nose, on the side in which bleeds.
Scalds and burns -- Apply a plaster of tar to the injured area. The inflammation and pain will subside.
Sore throat -- For half a quarter of an hour, boil a pint of milk mixed with some rye flour. Take two lily onions and the mixture and make poultice. Apply warm around the neck.
Swollen testicles -- Apply pounded rue to the swelling parts.
For red, itching eyes -- Wash eyes with a mixture of two ounces of water of roses and two ounces of white wine.
For deafness or dizziness -- Peel Garlic and dip in honey. Place this into ear with a little black wool. Lie with ear up. Do the same with the other ear the following night. Repeat process for eight to ten nights.
by Linda Miller
The ideal hero for a fictionalized romance story is basically simple. Just picture your ideal fantasy man; then write a physical description of him on a separate sheet of paper from your story. But always keep it handy, so you can glance at it. Occasionally, you can add things to it. For example, say he develops a new personality trait or some such idea. All ideas should be noted so you can use them again if a certain situation should arise in the story where having that particular trait might be convenient for your hero.
Kevin was the typical Italian stud-muffin. With his shoulder-length, wavy black hair, a somewhat aristocratic nose, and a rather square jawline, he was modeled, of course, after the young man who unknowingly captured my heart in junior high school.
His former conceit about his athletic prowess was defeated by the advancement of the calendar. Today he was 47, and he realized that age can be the final curtain call for some. Is he willing to let time's passage weigh him down.
I would suggest keeping a running description of each character for personal reference while writing your story. Note all personality traits as you come to them, so you don't have to explain their origin multiple times, but only when it makes itself evident the first time. Also, make sure you note the occurrence when it shows up, because you never know when a personality trait might come in handy for use again.
After the events of the previous month, Susan no longer followed the admonitions of her mother remembered from her childhood. Mother reminded her to always check all the doors of the house before you leave, or you might come home to a surprise house guest.
This by no means, means that you must have a set description of all your characters when you begin writing. You want to make your story to be an accurate depiction of everyday life as we know it, and normal people change from time to time. Some event in a person's life just may affect his/her reaction to a certain situation. This can occur often, and it might not be a very blatant or drastic change. It may not even by evident to the other characters for a while - just a slight change of attitude in a certain area of the character's life or in relation to a specific topic.
In spite of Kevin's receding hairline, he continued to arduously comb-style his hair as if it's presence were still actual.
As I stated, I've discovered it to be best if you allow your hero to be basically your personal fantasy man. After all, your writing is fantasy, so it needs no firm base in reality. You can give your hero any traits you think a female would find attractive or that you find attractive in your fantasy man. This description can be realistic or not-so realistic. Give this guy any traits or attitudes you think you might like in a man. Because in writing this fictional romance, this might very well be the only chance you have to have a man actually live up to all your desires concerning his physical and personality traits!
by Judy Ridgley
From the time Farmer Bronius was zapped by Jupiter's lightening bolt and the world was lit by sparks from Thor's hammer, mankind seems awed by this phenomenon. I know my son enjoys the storm fireworks when they are on display. Again, from William Crawford's book Mariner's Handbook, I've collected some descriptions of this power force that has mystified the world. These, too, may help electrify your character's settings.
"Lightening…involves the dual personality of high electrical current and dangerous heat." Just so you know. Remember the air currents in clouds rubbing elbows from "Cottony Clouds," well here's a list of these little devils:
Maybe these will brighten up your thunderous moments for your characters. Now I wonder if such lightning can happen in the gazes between people. Hummmm?
- Streak - is the line or lines of light between cloud and surface. (I take this as the most common sighting.)
- Forked - This lightening shows more exactly the direction of conduction between streaks. (Also very common.)
- Sheet - This is a formless flash seen over a large area between clouds. (I think of this as fireworks in Heaven.)
- Heat - Lightening also seen over from far away that reflects over the horizon. The night is usually humid and sweaty if I remember this right. You have to come out of the air conditioning to experience this.
- Ribbon - Lightening that appears in parallel strokes when high winds group the streaks into a pattern. So it's windy outside when this occurs.
- Beaded - Lightning is an interrupted stroke or streak. Why and how it's interrupted wasn't explained.
- Ball - These are careening spheres of light which "hiss and sizzle as they roll or dart or hang eerily in the air. Sometimes the lightning bolt will cause a terrifying whistle." How they are rolled up in a ball etc. was not explained either, hummph.
- St. Elmo's Fire - (Yep, there is such a thing.) It is a "ghostly luminous finger that can issue from a mast, yardarm or even the hand of a startled navigator. Termed 'corposants' because they seem the embodiment of supernatural power, such brush discharges of electricity are kin to lightening…but the intensity is far less than true lightening." This lightning can leap skyward from shipboard objects. These can be accompanied by loud claps and acrid smell as if from gungire. (Nice sensories here.)
A Short Course on Sexual Tension
by Lynn Michaels
At our last meeting, I sat across the table from a new member. Someone on my side asked what they wrote. One said contemporary. She'd submitted material and received positive feedback. Good story, good characters, but not enough sexual tension. She'd tried to fix this, but felt she kept missing the boat. My mouth was full at the time - this will surprise no one who knows me - and the conversation had moved on by the time I'd swallowed.
So, for this now newest member - and for Frances, who keeps bugging us to produce original material for the newsletter -- here's a short course on sexual tension.
What is sexual tension, anyway? First, it's pure physical attraction. An all-consuming awareness of a member of the opposite sex, an oh-be-sell-my-heart hum in every cell of your body. Think Mel Gibson. (Oh, be still my heart…) Second, because you're writing a romance, a story about two people falling in love and a committed, life-long relationship - not a one-night stand - it's a developing emotional bond between your hero and heroine.
All it takes to put the physical attraction into your stories is an awareness on your part that your heroine is so enthralled with her hero, so caught up in every nuance of this man that she can barely walk and talk in his presence. That's not how your heroine behaves in the hero's presence, of course - unless you're writing for Love & Laughter, maybe - it's simply how she feels. Never lose sight of this, or the fact that your hero feels the same way about the heroine - sexual tension is a two-way street.
Never pass up an opportunity to convey to your readers how physically attracted your heroine is in her hero. Use sensory detail and the five senses - sight, sound, scent, touch and taste - to show rather than tell. Your heroine's first glimpse of this man, the timber of his voice, the fragrance of his aftershave, the warmth of his hand, the flavor of his kiss.
Even when your couple isn't together, they should be totally absorbed in each other. Remembering what he said, wondering how he meant it - that's your developing emotional bond. Recalling the way the wind tugged her hair around her mouth and how much he wanted to kiss her. Aching/needing/wanting to be together, resenting everything that keeps them apart. Everything your couple does, says, touches, feels, tastes and hears reminds them of each other. All consuming.
When your couple is together, do the same thing. But what about my plot, you ask. They have to find out who killed Uncle Harry and why. I can't possibly keep fanning the flames between them, develop their emotional bond, reveal character and advance the plot all at the same time. Sure you can. This from a person who had no more idea about how to do this than you did when she started. But I learned by doing and this is what I learned - you do it all at the same time. It isn't easy, but you can do it. For instance:
"I can't imagine why anyone would want to kill Uncle Harry," Mia said.
It was a lie. She could think of at least two people, her cousins Tom and Tory, but she wasn't going to tell Lt. Steve Clark.He didn't say anything, just looked at her. Mia felt a flush start up her neck, part guilt at the lie, part fluster at being stared at so intently by such a handsome man. Mia bet he didn't have to interrogate female suspects. She was sure women swooned confessions at his feet. She wondered if his brown eyes were registered as lethal weapons. Too bad her father had raised her never to trust a cop.
"Uncle Harry was the sweetest man in the world," she said. Until you got to know him, she thought, and suppressed a shiver.
"Someone didn't agree with you, Miss Peters," Lt. Clark replied. "Any idea who?"She blinked, startled, and lowered her gaze, a flush creeping up her throat. A long, smooth and very kissable throat, Steve thought. Mia Peters was either the genuine article, a walking, talking sweet young thing and utterly clueless about her uncle's murder - the first he'd seen in fifteen years of police work, and what were the chances of that? - or she was one heck of an actress. Neat and sweet and sexy as hell in her prim little sky blue sweater set. He'd always been a sucker for blondes and sweaters. Too many old black and white Lana Turner movies when he was a kid and his mother had worked the night shift at the diner.
That's not brilliant - it's off the top of my head - but you get the idea. Mia and Steve are talking about her dead Uncle Harry. Obviously murdered, or Steve wouldn't be here. That's the surface plot - who killed him and why. Uncle Harry was the sweetest man in the world, Mia says. Until you got to know him, she thinks. Is she lying to protect her cousins or because her father raised her never to trust a cop? Now you're getting into character and motivation.
Steve is a cop, a synonym for cynic. It's his job not to trust people, to question everything and everyone. Yet he's always been a sucker for blondes and sweaters. Hopefully you get the idea he's going to be a sucker for Mia. She strikes a cord in Steve that goes way back to his childhood, probably a lonely one - this is your emotional bond again. Mia flushes at being stared at by such a handsome man and wonders if his brown eyes are registered as lethal weapons.
Mia and Steve are talking about Uncle Harry, but they're thinking about each other. Not as a cop and a suspect, but as a man and a woman. On down the road, they start thinking about each other as husband and wife, best friends, soulmates for life.
This is their first meeting, so I'm giving you an overview, their initial reaction to each other. In subsequent scenes, I'll go deeper. I'll use the five senses to highlight the physical attraction, and I'll beef up the emotional pull, too. I'll tell you why Mia doesn't trust cops and how she overcomes this. Here and there I'll flashback briefly to Steve's lonely childhood and why he's so cynical. I'll show you - I won't tell you - how Mia's stomach flutters when she sees Steve, with dread that he's come to ask her more questions and sheet joy at just seeing him. She'll start wishing he wasn't a cop. He'll start wishing Mia wasn't a suspect, that she'd stop looking like a frightened rabbit whenever she sees him. He wants her to smile with pleasure when she sees him, say, "Hi Steve," rather than "Hello, Lt. Clark." He wants to touch her, she wants him to hold her, he wants to protect her, she wants to cook him breakfast.
Don't write separate scenes; a plot scene followed by a character scene and then a sexual tension/emotion scene. This makes a choppy, disjointed read. Weave these scenes together, character development and motivation with your plot. And always, because you're writing romance, remember that sexual tension and the developing love story - the emotional bond between your hero and heroine - is the major thread in all your scenes. It gets top billing. It's the reason, the justification, for the existence of the rest of the book.
And now, if you'll excuse me, it's time for lunch.
by Sharon G. Clark
How do we achieve creative credibility inside the magic of fantasy romance?
Let’s generalize the definitions for our point.
Magic – the art of persons who claim to be able to do things with the help of supernatural powers or by their own knowledge of nature’s secrets.
Romance – a prose narrative dealing with heroic or mysterious events; a love story.
Fantasy – a product of imagination.Fantasy begins in the mind – your mind. Romance begins in the heart – your heart. If you convince the reader what you are writing can and is really happening, you have taken them on a quest through a believable romantic fantasy. This kind of writing takes style, craft, enthusiasm and imagination.
To write romantic fantasy, as with any work of fiction, you need to know the genre. Read stories by Anne McCaffrey, Piers Anthony, Terry Brooks and Laurell K. Hamilton, in addition to our own RWA sisters Kathleen Morgan, Jayne Castle (Jayne Ann Krentz), and Nora Roberts (J.D. Robb). Read lesser known authors, classics, and even stories by writer colleagues in other local and regional groups. Don’t forget about research into other cultures as well as our own. History is rich with mythology, legend, and folklore. Read, read, read. We learn from those authors who have already been through the process we are trying to perfect. (A good series to read is DragonLance or Forgotten Realms.)
Your romantic fantasy can be as effective as the writers above – the magic trick (no pun intended) is to follow the genre but invent your own twists and turns. One magic secret of all your reading – you’ll know the twists and turns already taken by other authors. You’ll know what works, what doesn’t; what is tried and true, what hasn’t been attempted at all. Finding the key to any genre lies in the creativity you invent and invest, and for fantasy romance this is especially true.
In most romantic fantasy books, and for the purpose of this article, magic plays an integral part. As with all things, however, it must be uniform, believable fantasy. This depends on the creativity and consistency of the world you create and its people. Another thing to keep in mind – hey, I never said this would be easy – is the customs of the people in your world. Each culture has set customs passed down through generations, some good and some bad, each with reason and meaning – no matter how outdated or ridiculous by American standards.
Since fantasy generally takes place in the distant past or in an alternative universe, magic can be added effectively to your fictional world. Be careful! It’s all too easy to give characters a power s/he didn’t have to begin with; consequently, the continuity and believability of your story is destroyed. To avoid this, on the profile sheet of your characters (or on a three by five index card) include all the spells and powers relating to magic that your hero/heroine possesses. Keep your lists organized and easy to find so you don’t miss anything once you begin writing. No cramming spells into corners when things get exciting! Don’t frustrate your reader by giving them a reason to toss your book against the wall, or use it as a door stop.
Remember that your main characters may not be the only magical creatures in the world you create. Your story may contain dragons, centaurs, chimeras, elves, nymphs, gnomes, and fairies. Don’t forget these when you create your index cards.
If you use a progressive scheme of magic for a character to go from apprentice to magician, design that scheme before you begin writing. List each stage of development on the profile sheet or index card, and describe the powers, spells, requirements, etc. Please, don’t forget limitations; even a powerful wizard, good or bad, tires after a battle. (A good tool to use in the planning stage would be a Dungeons and Dragons game.)
Try drawing a magic tree, similar to a family tree. Instead of family members, trace the steps and requirements for becoming a magician (or whatever you decide to call the equivalent of magical power in the world you’re creating). Ask yourself questions, lots of them. Did your character get his/her magic from practice, or is it inherited? Is it a curse, or a blessing? How magic is gained may have a bearing on how your character views it.
Consistency is essential to believability. If your readers don’t believe in the magic you create, how will they ever get interested and involved in the plight of your characters?
As in all stories, organize your magic tale. It’s a quest of having one word flow into the next, one scene, one chapter flowing, flowing…until the reader has finished. And wants to read more!
The right combination of character, creativity, fantasy, language and magic can be the most difficult task you will ever undertake as a writer – but it is worth the effort. Especially when the result is a well-written romantic fantasy, a story that allows readers to – as if by magic – suspend disbelief for the duration of your book.
So… do you believe in magic?
Sharon G. Clark, freelance editor for Hard Shell Word Factory from 1996 to 1999 - and winner of The 1998 Sapphire Award as the Editor of A Wizard Scorned, by Patricia White - is a General member of RWA, HeRA, Fantasy Futuristic and Paranormal Chapter, Kiss of Death, Sisters in Crime and EPIC
About the Sapphire Award (as taken from the SFA web site):
As part of an effort to raise awareness of Science Fiction Romance, and to recognize the outstanding authors already publishing in the field, the SF Romance newsletter sponsors the Sapphire Award for the best science fiction romance of the year, with the nominees chosen and winners selected by readers of the SF Romance newsletter. Works must be novel-length books with a first publication date (hardcover or softcover) of December (of the preceding year) through November. They may have been published in any genre (or even mainstream), but both the science fiction and the romance must be intrinsic to the story.
It's Not What You Do, But How You Do It
by Sharon G. Clark
The goal of every writer, at least this one, is to write a memorable book; one the reader can’t forget after they’ve finished. How is this possible when the choices of plot is limited? What if I write a story with a plot used to death? Readers will think I have no imagination. After all, how can the writer write new what has been written about repeatedly?
Well, it isn’t what you write, but how you write it.
You aren’t limited by stating the tried and true classic plots, you are only laying the understandable foundation – recognition. As with plots, it’s the short and easy way to sum up the basis of the events which will transpire in your own story. If someone were to ask what type of house you lived in, and you answered Victorian, you have given an idea of what to expect as to the general looks and features of your home. It may also give clues as to the personality of a person. What type of person lives in a ranch style? A mansion? Were they born there, or inherited the ownership? Are they happy or haunted? Is the home haunted? When told it’s “a woman in jeopardy” story, it gives the reader an idea how the plot will work throughout the story. There are numerous ways for a woman to be in a jeopardy predicament. And we know someone is after her and it could turn deadly.
Plot is the story blueprint; the internal logic or sequence of events leading characters from beginning situations and attitudes to those when the ‘problem solving effort’ is over. It establishes the base for the cause and effect (not limited to dialogue and scenes) your story will take.
What are some of the classic plots?
These are a few of what is available for classic plots, especially for romance. There is no harm in a mix of the above as long as it’s believable. Make sure to keep the story vibrant and the relationships humming. If you’re an avid reader, as most of us are, you’ve read numerous versions of a story built on any one of these plots. So what made it different? How can you use one of the above, and make your story unforgettable?
- Secret Baby – a romance from years ago, in which a pregnancy resulted. Now they’ve come together again, but he doesn’t know about the baby.
- Cinderella – rags to riches. You can do gender reversal on this one.
- Beauty and the Beast – one of them is physically marred in some way.
- Good Girl/Bad Boy – he needs to be redeemed in some way, and she is straight laced.
- Bad Girl/Good Boy – similar to above, only she’s kooky and drives him crazy, he’s so clean he squeaks.
- Snowbound/Stranded – enforced intimacy forces hero and heroine to deal with each other. Amnesia – one helps the other when memory is lost.
- Marriage of Convenience – seems the best way to handle a monumental situation, or could be arranged or forced marriage. This is great for sexual tension and conflict. Be sure, though, to avoid contrivances.
- Family Feud – two people or families are on opposite sides. Romeo and Juliet or the Hatfield and McCoy feud.
- Physical Disability – one has a physical disability that can only be cured by the love of the other.
- Mistaken Identity – one isn’t who the other thinks them to be.
- Lady and the Cowboy – they have a class difference that sets them apart. This doesn’t have to be literally translated, just enough difference to put one above the other to get the sparks flying.
- Homemaker and the Rover – he’s never stayed in a spot long enough to grow moss, and she’s a homebody secure in her warm and caring haven. He learns he can’t live without her love.
- Secret – one harbors a secret that, once revealed, could threaten their newfound love.
- Twins – when dealing with twins, this could go a lot of ways: good twin/bad twin; mistaking the identity of a twin; or one twin is matchmaking for the other.
- Masquerade– pretending to be someone else or a different kind of person all together. If you use the female masquerading as a male, be sure to keep fresh and original, above all, believable. Nowadays, she’d have to be a Victor/Victoria drag queen type.
- Kidnapping – someone is abducted. Good for emotional characterization and filled with dangerous overtones.
- Business Competitors – good for conflict, especially if only one can win the brass ring.
Aristotle proposed that every functional plot should have a beginning, a middle, and an end. The beginning establishes the potential. The middle plays these potentials against one another. The end should describe how it turned out.
So, we know which plot, or combination of plots, we want to use. We know how we want it to start, events that will occur, and, at least, a general idea how it will all turn out. Now we have to give our story character.
What better way to give a story character? – Your characters.
The characterization is important as we are developing the bond of hero and heroine. The more complex the character, the better the reader is able to assure motivation is understood. We don’t necessarily have to agree with or like the character’s motivation, just understand it from their point of view. Your heroine gets a nose ring (heaven forbid, yuck). I, the reader, don’t agree or like the idea, but this is what your character did. Show me how it was a reaction to an abusive parent, or some traumatic event, and I’ll at least understand the psychological issue she is trying to overcome. With this in mind… No, my nose feels funny keeping this in mind, so let’s just move on.
An important character issue to consider when deciding which plot you’ll use is self-concept (cause) and change (effect). No two people will think and/or react the exact same way to a given situation, even from similar lifestyles or backgrounds. For example, two single, middle class, working women finding themselves pregnant won’t handle the situation the same. And because two people come from a different social class doesn’t mean they won’t have similar thoughts and/or reactions. Take, for example, fear of abandonment (another for the list); no social class, no ethnic background, no male or female heart is immune. In fact, no human is immune to fear of any kind, real or imagined.
So… our hero takes our heroine and gets her all dolled up, but she has a low self-image. She’ll respond different than a woman with a highly positive self-image. Thus, you’ve taken a classic plot based on a Cinderella. But let’s add a different twist (nothing like over-simplifying, huh?). Rather than feel like the bell of the ball, she has an anxiety attack and passes out. When she regains consciousness, she sneaks away, packs her bags and finds another fireplace to keep company. Is our hero willing to give up his fortune, locate her, and to spend the rest of his life sitting on the opposite stool? How will this, if at all, change her self-concept?
It’s the human psyche to crave change. We’re all looking for something better, maybe emotionally, maybe materially, or maybe both. Our self-concept will play a major role in how we handle the change, especially if it’s thrust upon us. Whether the outcome to this change is good or bad, we will have changed; our self-concept somehow – even in a minute way – is altered.
The Buddhists believe the universe is ordered by cause and effect. As individuals we are ordered by no less. Our past, our present, our progress, and what our future holds influence us. We are in the present having survived out past (how well is up to us); however, it has provided the catalyst that decides how we are and will progress, to move us into the future.
No matter the plot you choose to use,you make it different. Just because your story is described by using a classic plot, you give it credibility – believability – better than any that have gone before. So take those tried and true plots and add such oomph that readers will be talking – and praising – your story for years to come.
“What’s your latest book about?”
“It’s the classic rival plot, but get this…”
